In the past few years New Years has meant nothing to me. I don't write resolutions because I feel like that's setting myself up to break them, so I just make goals randomly through out the year. However, this year feels SO different! I don't know what it is, but I feel like this year holds so much potential, and I'm really looking forward to it.
Instead of writing lists of resolutions, a couple of my friends wrote their goals for this year out in one word. I thought this was a really great idea, but wasn't really for me. Since this is my first year in a long time even writing resolutions I figured I should stick to the list and then maybe in a couple of years I will try it that way. As I thought about the goals I have made though, I did think of one word that summed up most of them: LOVE. That didn't quite encompass everything I want for this year though so I added one more: LEARN.
LOVE: I have spent the past few years being really bitter and self-centered. I don't know why. I just have. I have had opportunities to make life long friendships with people I absolutely adore, and have completely let them slip away. I haven't kept in touch with friends I do have, and I've held grudges toward people I care deeply for and let that hurt our relationship. Until a month ago I had never done my visiting teaching unless my partner set it up because I was too afraid to take charge. I'm totally sick of this. I don't want to be that kind of person. So this year I've decided, or better yet, resolved!, to open my heart. I want to lose myself in loving other people. Because I really do love people! I just really stink at showing it. I want to stop being shy and closed off, I want to make friendships and nurture the relationships I am so blessed to have.
LEARN: And for the other half of my 2014, there is so much I want to learn! Like I said I feel like there is so much potential this year, and I want to use it well. I am going to stop shying away from learning new things. For instance, I haven't blogged in years because I don't know how to design my blog the way I want. But I'm going to learn! I have a new camera and I am going to get as good as I can at using it. And I have more....
Anyway though I am so excited for this year! No more avoiding life and all the goodness it holds. I am going to love and learn till I don't have room to be bitter and stagnant anymore!
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Twenty Five
A couple months ago I turned 25, and although I don't feel old yet I feel like I've hit a milestone. It made me think a little, and it hit me that I am exactly where I always wanted to be at this age. Back in school or church when we were asked to write our goals or where we planned to be in 10 years the most important things to me were that I was married in the Temple to an amazing guy (and was still married), and was a mom. I feel so blessed to be where I am right now. I married that amazing guy I had dreamed of in the Oquirrh Mountain Temple back in 2010 and I can gladly say I love him so much more now than I did that day. And a couple years later had an adorable baby girl and now the cutest little boy ever!
Although the road to get here wasn't quite like I expected it would be, and I know there are a lot more surprises to come, it is so much better than I imagined it would be. And I had high expectations! Being a mom is the greatest thing in the world. I'm literally not exaggerating at all. It's the hardest thing I have ever done, but it truly is the best thing in the world to me.
Sometimes I catch myself wanting more. I want a house, and I want to be closer to family, and I want to live in a city that isn't freezing all the time and has more than one grocery store. But it doesn't take a lot to stop and realize how great life is even without those things. All I really need is what I have, and that is my loving husband who comes home to us every night after work, the ability to care for my children and love them every day, and my testimony. Life would be so different without the gospel of Jesus Christ. I get to go through every day knowing that my family and I are loved and watched over, and that even if bad things happen, we will be together forever after this. I have so much to be thankful for! Life really is beautiful!
Although the road to get here wasn't quite like I expected it would be, and I know there are a lot more surprises to come, it is so much better than I imagined it would be. And I had high expectations! Being a mom is the greatest thing in the world. I'm literally not exaggerating at all. It's the hardest thing I have ever done, but it truly is the best thing in the world to me.
Sometimes I catch myself wanting more. I want a house, and I want to be closer to family, and I want to live in a city that isn't freezing all the time and has more than one grocery store. But it doesn't take a lot to stop and realize how great life is even without those things. All I really need is what I have, and that is my loving husband who comes home to us every night after work, the ability to care for my children and love them every day, and my testimony. Life would be so different without the gospel of Jesus Christ. I get to go through every day knowing that my family and I are loved and watched over, and that even if bad things happen, we will be together forever after this. I have so much to be thankful for! Life really is beautiful!
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